I travel frequently across the country giving presentations about senior living choices, including continuing care retirement communities (CCRCs), often called life plan communities. During these visits I meet both current residents and people considering a move to a CCRC or other senior living option. Hearing both perspectives is always illuminating.
When I speak with prospective residents, a common concern I hear is reluctance to move because they don’t feel “ready” or they don’t want to be around a lot of “old people.” Sometimes that reaction comes from seeing a few residents who use walkers or scooters. I understand those feelings—whether they’re spoken directly or felt more subtly.
Lack of diversity vs. fear of aging
For some, the objection reflects a preference for an intergenerational environment, where people of many ages live and interact. That is perfectly reasonable. Fortunately, many CCRCs and other senior living communities are developing intergenerational programs that bring young and old together, with benefits for both generations. These initiatives include shared activities, educational partnerships, and social programs that enrich residents’ lives.
For others, however, the sentiment may reveal an underlying fear of aging. I’ve met people in their 80s who say they’re “too young” to move into a retirement community. It’s as if being around people who have experienced physical decline will somehow make them frailer themselves—as if aging were contagious. That perception is understandable, but it doesn’t match the reality I’ve observed.
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A continued lifestyle
Many seniors who worry about living among “old people” have led active, healthy lives and stayed young at heart. Does moving to a CCRC threaten that lifestyle? Based on visits to nearly a hundred CCRCs, I’ve found the opposite is more often true.
People who arrive active and health-conscious usually stay that way—often even more so—because CCRCs actively promote wellness. Fitness classes, wellness centers, nutritious dining options, social events, cultural outings, affinity groups, and lifelong learning opportunities are commonly available and encourage both physical activity and mental engagement. Participation is optional, and residents remain free to travel, dine out, host friends, and continue their personal routines.
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So when seniors resist CCRCs because they don’t want to be around other older adults, I wonder whether that reluctance is a form of ageism among peers or a deeper cultural discomfort with aging itself.
Contempt for growing old
A 2013 Pew Research Center survey of more than 2,000 U.S. adults explored views on aging, medical advances, and radical life extension. The findings showed mixed feelings about longevity. When asked how long they would like to live:
- Fewer than 10 percent hoped to live to 100 or beyond.
- About 20 percent wanted to live into their 90s.
- Roughly 32 percent hoped to reach their 80s.
- About 30 percent said they didn’t want to live past 80.
At the same time, 41 percent of respondents felt that having more elderly people in the population would be a positive for society. That contrast is striking: many people appreciate older adults’ contributions, yet a large share of respondents expressed little desire for extreme longevity. It’s a thought-provoking paradox.
>> Related: The Invisible Senior: Confronting Ageism in the U.S.
What does it mean to be “old”?
Age is, ultimately, a number. That doesn’t deny the physical changes that come with growing older, but many people adapt to aging with resilience and a positive outlook. I’ve met residents in their 80s and 90s who remain energetic and engaged, sometimes appearing decades younger in spirit and activity. A consistent trait among these individuals is a positive mindset and an eagerness to keep learning and participating.
My question is this: can we move toward a culture that values people for who they are and what they contribute, regardless of age or physical condition? If we shift our focus from age to experience, we can learn from one another and grow as a community. Recognizing the worth of every generation—embracing intergenerational ties, promoting health and engagement, and challenging ageist assumptions—can help reshape how we think about aging and where people choose to live.