In last week’s blog post, I shared another study finding that people who choose to move to a retirement community, such as a continuing care retirement community (CCRC) or life plan community, tend to be healthier and happier overall than those who remain in their long-time homes. I noted then that these benefits don’t always appear immediately after a move. That’s an important point worth exploring further.
When I speak with CCRC residents, some describe a transition period that requires emotional adjustment as they adapt to life in a retirement community. This week I received a thoughtful email from CCRC resident and physician Dr. Harvey Austin, M.D., who described his observations about this very adjustment period. In a previous post I shared Dr. Austin’s firsthand perspectives on moving to StoneRidge, a CCRC in Mystic, Connecticut.
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“The Fog That Follows Change”
Dr. Austin has coined a phrase for the bumpy period some people experience after moving to a CCRC: “The Fog That Follows Change.” He writes, “I believe ‘The Fog’ to be normal, common (perhaps universal), and it can last for months, perhaps years.” While some residents feel their move was pleasant, desirable, and safe, others feel uprooted or even abandoned by family members who helped make the decision.
Although his own experience moving to a CCRC has been very positive, Dr. Austin acknowledges that any move involves loss—leaving a home where a family was raised, letting go of possessions that won’t fit in a smaller space. That sense of loss can produce grief and the disorientation he calls “The Fog.”
He likens new residents to “immigrants to this new land.” Some newcomers describe the community as a cruise ship or a summer camp for older adults. Others view it more negatively, as if it were “the waiting room of the funeral parlor.” Whichever perception a person holds, their feelings are real: excitement, fear, joy, sadness, relief, or loneliness are all valid responses to this life change.
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A CCRC move IS a life change
Dr. Austin’s description of “The Fog” is spot on. A move to a CCRC is a significant life transition, and the mixed emotions that come with it are legitimate. In conversations with residents across the country, I hear many of the same concerns, but I also hear that, given time, most people adjust and come to appreciate their new home.
A large part of that adjustment is building connections in a new environment. A retirement community isn’t just a set of buildings — it’s the people who live and work there. Strong communities depend on relationships, and relationships require time and opportunity to form.
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What you can do to deal with “The Fog”
More CCRCs are recognizing the challenges some new residents face during their first months or even years in a new setting. I recently spoke with several CCRC executives about improving orientation and support programs to ease this transition.
Often, a helpful first step is simply acknowledging residents’ feelings: “We’re glad you chose to live here and believe you’ll find fulfillment, but we also recognize this transition can stir many emotions. We’re here to walk with you.” Validation from staff and neighbors can make a real difference.
Dr. Austin shared several practical steps new residents can take to manage “The Fog.” These include:
- Notice your feelings and accept that they are normal and legitimate.
- Talk about your emotions with a friend, family member, or counselor.
- Explore orientation services your community offers—such as a buddy system or small support groups—to help you connect with others who are adjusting.
- Say “yes” to invitations and activities so you can meet people and get involved.
- Be honest when someone asks, “How are you?”
- Be kind and patient with yourself. Practice self-care, whether that’s a favorite treat or a walk in nature.
- Give it time. These feelings are real, but they usually pass as you settle in and form new relationships.
These steps can help residents adapt to new surroundings. Importantly, Dr. Austin reminds us that “The Fog” does not mean something is wrong with you; it can be a natural response to a meaningful life change and, in that sense, a sign that you’re processing that change in a healthy way.
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Your feelings are normal…whatever they may be
Just this week I spoke with residents who said they felt no “Fog” and loved their new community right away. Attitude matters, and a positive outlook can ease the transition. But everyone’s experience is different. For some, the move can be bumpier and include the feelings Dr. Austin describes. For many, those initial mixed emotions fade over time as friendships form and daily life takes on new meaning.
Ultimately, most residents who initially struggled with the transition find themselves settled, engaged, and grateful for their new community—often experiencing improved quality of life over time, the very benefit recent research continues to highlight.